Things That Make ME Unique: What Makes YOU Unique?

I am the penultimate American.

My father was an immigrant to the United States. His parents came to the US from Flanders (a very tiny region of Belgium) in the period between the world wars.  My father began working alongside his parents in the sugar beet fields in Michigan when he was just a young boy. He didn’t go to school or speak much English until he was nine years old. When he completed 8^th grade his mother forced him to leave school and help support the family again. It wasn’t until he was married and had children that he went to night school to earn his high school diploma. Despite the fact my father voted for years he didn’t find out until just before I got married that he wasn’t a US citizen. Long story but it was quite a challenge for him to acquire his US citizenship.

In contrast my mother’s family immigrated to the United States from England on the second voyage of the Mayflower. Her family lived in the eastern part of the US and acquired thousands of acres of land. They harvested and regrew forests so they make charcoal that was used to heat and cook with. She had two relatives who fought in the revolutionary war. My mother was honored by the governor of the state of Michigan for her work in Special Education. She was also the first woman to ever run for mayor of our town.

My parents at my daughter's wedding.

I have been married twice.

In today’s world of divorced and blended family’s that’s not really that unusual anymore. BUT both my husbands were attacked by a wild animal.  Now THAT is unique!  My first husband was attacked by a hippo while swimming in the Semilike River in what is now the Democratic Republic of Congo. We were living there and working as missionaries. He was there with our two oldest children who were 7 and 9 at the time. They were on a spiritual retreat with the secondary level students at the school where my husband was the principal. On a sunny and warm afternoon he was swimming in the river showing our children how to float in the water when he accidently bumped into a hippo. This initial collision resulted in a number of broken ribs. But it was when he twisted himself in the water (presenting his rear end instead of his head) that the hippo just chomped down and took him into his mouth. He was a very lucky man and although horribly hurt he survived and didn’t lose his leg.

Right after college my second husband was sponsored to host physical fitness programs in schools across the US. President Kennedy had initiated the president’s physical fitness program to foster an interest in living a more active lifestyle.  Bill and his future wife were selected to be part of a group of top athletes to put on shows to school students.  Bored with their performance Bill heard that the zoo in Minneapolis was hoping to find an owner for a small bear cub. Turned out the cub wasn’t that small and Bill decided that maybe it was just a bit too large to take on tour with them. He was then told he might be interested in a lion instead.  (I know this sounds too stupid to be true but I swear to you it is..) He agreed to take a look at the lion and foolishly entered the cage. Seems like the lion liked him a bit too much. Indeed, the lion took a real interest in his right hand. Fortunately a fast thinking handler warned Bill not to do anything but gently pull his hand free. Easier said than done. He’s a lucky man he walked away with just minor cuts and bruises.

Go figure…who’d believe it. Actually, my first husband had more than his share of animal encounters including a very close encounter of a herd kind with an elephant but that’s another story for another day.

Two of my kids were almost killed in horrible freak accidents.

Where we lived in Zaire seldom had electricity. It was almost a rarity to have it. Yet, my two year old son was electrocuted and almost killed when he picked up a live 220 volt electrical chord to a generator. His right hand was horribly burned and required numerous (I don’t remember anymore but I think it was around 10) plastic surgeries to rebuild his hand. The part of the brain that controls language function was also damaged. He was lucky because he was so young the nerves regenerated to both his burned hand and the part of the brain damaged by the accident.  Probably the most significant impact from his accident is that it made him so much more aware of so many things in life that so many people take for granted. He’s one of the most sensitive, generous, and kind individuals you’ll ever meet. To this day Ted loves to fool around with electricity. Go figure!

Jonny (younger brother) and Ted

When living in Rwanda my oldest son fell out of a tree and suffered from two broken arms that both needed to be reduced. The doctors were so worried about properly setting them in a closed reduction procedure they failed to properly evaluate him for internal injuries. He was minutes from a complete rupture when they discovered he had an encapsulated rupture of his spleen.  They had to remove his spleen and shortly after his recovery he was returned to the US in an emergency medical evacuation.  He required a transfusion during his surgery—a major issue in a country rampant with HIV/AIDS. His father could only give him two pints of blood but the doctors warned us that spleenectomies require many units of blood. The thought of going into a blood supply that might be tainted was as terrifying to us as the thought of his spleen rupturing. Amazingly, Danny only needed one unit of his father’s blood. To this day Danny loves rock climbing and leads on climbs to some foolish number—has no meaning to me but I’m sure he’ll comment and share what level of complexity they are.

Even broken arms and a splenectomy can't keep this kid down.

I have a PhD in education and have taught at both the primary school and university levels.  Yet I HATE school!

I totally completely passionately hated school when I was a kid. Because of this I played hooky as often as I could. I told my mom (who was also a teacher) that I had sore throats a lot (well, that’s true I did have them a lot but not as often as I told her that I did). I loved to stay home and make Barbie and other doll clothes and watch old movies—those old black and white ones where they sang and danced and nothing bad ever happened. I became a teacher because it was just the default profession. But I loved kids and I loved seeing them grow and do things they could never do  before. My goal in life now is to make going to school fun and giving everyone the same chance to attend school and  learn. And I totally dig empowering teachers to do a better job.

My husband is the master  to a Portuguese Water Dog.  The Portuguese Water Dog Masters my husband.

We chose to get this kind of dog because my son-in-law is deathly allergic to dog dander. In theory waterdogs are supposed to be dander free (well if they are they still cause problems for those with a dog dander allergy). Waterdogs are also one of the most hyper and intelligent breeds of dogs out there.  You may be asking yourself, “So, what is so unique about this?” Well, have you ever had a dog that chewed the insulation off the garage door to the tune of $500? Or, have you had a dog that crawled under your son’s jeep and chewed up the wiring harness to the tune of $1500?  Hmmm, I didn’t think so.   The dog is a total MENACE but my husband loves him dearly. I have to admit the dog is really cute but he’s also the reincarnation of the devil.  Nuff said. (I know all you dog and animal lovers out there are going to crucify me for saying this but Brinkley (yeah that’s his name—and when you read number 6 you might make the connection) really is a high maintenance dog). I LOVE dogs and adored Rusty the dog we had before this but Brinkley just pushes my buttons. Yes, I admit it—he’s smarter than I am and knows it —darn dog!!

Brinkley, the devil dog, on his throne.

I met my current husband on the internet.

It was a turning out to be a very bad day when I first met Bill. I learned earlier that afternoon that the company I worked for had lost the Head Start contract I was scheduled to work on for the next five years. And then on the way home from work I was rear ended in a traffic accident by a driver who I later found out provided fake ID for himself and the car he was driving. Major bummer indeed.  Anyway, by time I got home that night I was hurt  (whip lash) and demoralized. So I was looking for someone ANYONE to talk with that night and distract me from all my pains and woes. I think lots of people are meeting online today but when  Bill and I first met on the internet and later got married it was  not tha common. He lived in Ohio and I lived in Virginia when we chanced to meet in a chat room. Chat rooms can be notoriously dangerous places to hang out and certainly don’t offer much in terms of intellectual conversation but I found my diamond there and I certainly hope he feels the same way.  (BTW don’t expect any confirmation of this by him, he doesn’t read my blog.) So, what seemed like such a really bad day ended up not being such a bad day after all. I might add his mother was horrified that we met that way and did not want anyone to know about how we met.

My diamond in the pool.

I have been shot at once, held at machine gun point once and had a bayonet menacingly thrust at me once.

I don’t live a risky life style or have a penchant for wild excitement in my life. I’m actually a very timid person who DOES NOT believe in putting myself in any kind of risky situation. Having said that I seem to have been thrust into some rather scary situations that have highlighted for me just how horrible life can be for millions of people out there.  Each time there were extenuating circumstances that ended with things spiraling out of control and the threat of violence emerged. The most frightening was when my ex-husband and I and our four children ended a restful day driving along the peaceful shores of beautiful Lake Tanganyika in Burunfi being held at machine gun point for almost 45 minutes when we accidently got disoriented on a road leading out of the airport. Needless to say, having some young kid holding a gun to your head puts a lot of things in life into perspective.  Not the least of them is the awareness that if you weren’t white, and an expatriate things might have turned out completely different than they did.

I have the four best kids in the world.

This is not up for discussion. There is no debating this fact. I know you might think you have the best most awesome kids in the world. Well, I’ll grant you that you are entitled to think that. But so am I. My kids are the crowning jewels in all I do in life. They bring meaning to what is probably an otherwise pretty ordinary life. I thank them for bringing me such joy.  There is nothing else I can do in my life that will ever even come close to being as wonderful and as incredible as being their mother. There is nothing that can be better. And there is nothing that makes me more unique.

The kids with their father and friends in Alaska. Brent, Jonny, Ted, Dwight, Danny, Bob and Heather. This is them all grunged up.

Danny, John (a friend), Ted and Jonny in fancy duds.

Heather and Dwight in their fancy clothes!